Work is increasingly frustrating and unbearable, mostly due to the continued absence of my boss. Yes, having broken her wrist on the 10th of January, she has still not returned to work. Questions regarding who is covering her position as Dean have gone unanswered by the VP's office, as she does some things from home. But between her appointments and the painkillers she's on, it is a hit-or-miss arrangement. Further raising my frustration level is that she has done NOTHING about hiring someone to cover my maternity leave. We have a pile of resumes for a job that was supposed to begin last week, but no direction as to what to do from either her or the VP’s office. Add on top of that that she was to have had surgery last Friday, which they then cancelled as she had a fever, and her return date is unknown. Well, until five minutes ago, when she called me (ooooohhh, FINALLY!). She plans on being in tomorrow, and has a laundry list to go through with me. It will be interesting to see what her attitude is, since she’s been such a wench towards me. The number of people who have commented on her lengthy absence is mounting along with their frustration levels; it was noted by one of my department chairs that I returned to work faster after losing Jimmy (I was induced, delivered him, and was still back to work within a month). Others have been just as ticked off, having suffered broken limbs, cardiac issues, etc., and having returned to work sooner than she. On top of it, she has an EXTREMELY bad habit of, when you are out on sick or vacation leave, of just assuming that she can call you at home. I mean, this woman called my hospital room when I was in LABOR with DS#2 to check on me and then ask two or three questions as to where items were. This time around, I’m not answering the GD phone. Even better, her boss, the VP, is a high-school classmate of my parents. DM has stated that, if my boss does call the house, she will speak with her, reminding her that I’m on leave. The second call that takes place will result in DM calling the VP personally to bitch at him regarding his Dean’s behavior. I can’t wait!
The daily movement of Stick-It brings joy on my part as well as being increasingly uncomfortable. The u/s tech didn't bother measuring size or weight last week, deciding that she didn't need to based on his 92nd percentile placement the week before. I will remind myself Wednesday to demand it, as Dr. Fav has requested it; I'm sure that a medical degree outweighs whatever degree you have to be an u/s tech.
We did bring both boys to last week’s early morning u/s. DS#2, the 8-year-old, was enthralled the minute the tech turned on the sound and you could hear the baby’s heartbeat. The amount of blue goo (u/s gel) distributed across my belly by the tech also was a source of amazement to him. DS#1, the 12-year-old, was more interested in the actual scan, and asked for a few pics to take, as his science teacher offered him extra credit if he brought some in (they will be doing some anatomy & physiology this term, I guess).
After the scan, they were dropped off at their respective schools. That night, DS#1 came into the TV room where I was folding laundry. I could tell something was bugging him, and sure enough, there was. The u/s pics had been the source of attention that day, and DS#1 was talking with a group of his friends. These are kids we go camping with every summer, that are on his indoor soccer team, a close bunch of kids whose parents, particularly the moms, are close to DH and myself as well. It seems that his buddy E., in the midst of this circle, proceeded to say to DS, “Jeez, would you just quit talking about this baby already?!?!” DS, being a sensitive kid, said nothing back, but was obviously upset about it.
My advice was that he approach E. when there was a group around, even if it were after their soccer game the next night, and say something along the lines of “You know, E., about what you said the other day about how I should quit talking about this baby… I don’t think you understand why my whole family is so excited. You don’t know what it’s like to be looking forward to having a baby brother and then to be told that he’s died before you could meet him, or to have to bury him, or watch your parents cry. So if I’m excited and I’m talking about it all the time, that’s not my problem.” I told him that he’d look like the good guy, and at the same time wouldn’t be attacking his friend or telling him to shut up or being argumentative, that all he’d be doing was trying to explain the situation. He told me the next day the kid had backed off, but I still had my concerns.
On top of this, Dr. Fav, at last week’s appointment, indicated that he doesn’t think Stick-It is going to turn. Apparently, there was hope (and room) for him to turn on his own when he was in the frank breech position (head up, butt down, with his knees tucked to his chest and his feet in the air by his head). This last week’s u/s showed that he’s now in the incomplete breech position, which means one of the legs is now down and his foot is by his butt, almost bracing him against turning. He’ll make the final call at this week’s appointment (my 37 wk), but we’re scheduled at this point for a C-section on Friday, February 8th.
We’ve shared this news with the boys, and it seems to have only heightened DS#1’s growing apprehension about this whole situation. He’s gotten very clingy, to the point at which he didn’t want to go to one of his buddy’s houses Saturday night for a sleepover, and he has made a comment to DH along the lines of “nothing good ever happens at that hospital”. He has a point: my DM had breast cancer surgery there, DH had his heart attack there, we learned that Jimmy was stillborn and I delivered him there, a year later I was in the ER having my miscarriage and then two months later my D&C, and my DF, with a bleeding ulcer so severe that we almost lost him, was treated there. I called my GF, the mom of the kid he turned down, back on Saturday night to explain that DS is just getting very apprehensive. She had some great suggestions, as did DH. I think that in the next day or two, I’m going to call E.’s mom, another GF in this group, just to ask that she ask E. to give DS some leeway. I don’t know if it will work, particularly as she’s one of those moms who never admits that her kid does ANYTHING wrong (he’s getting a rep as something of a bully lately) and she’ll probably blow it off, but at least I’ll have had my say.
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