Same Time, Different Pregnancy

Today marks the same point in this pregnancy as the point in my perfectly healthy third pregnancy when things went SOOOOooo Freakin’ Wrong. I woke up yesterday at 6:30. Well, I should say that I was woken up by DS#1 asking me to open the battery compartment on his cell phone to get it to start (long story, but I think the kid uses/jostles/jolts the thing so much the connection comes loose). Before you think this child is strange or calling friends way too early, he is up at 6:00 every morning and has to leave for middle school by 7:00 a.m.; school starts for the middle schoolers and high schoolers in our town at 7:23 a.m. I should also explain that I sleep on the couch most nights; it’s more comfortable on my back, and I’m a very sound sleeper, so if I nod off watching Dancing With the Stars, it’s over, folks. Because I’m always on my side sleeping on the couch, Stick-It’s kicks are enhanced, and for the past three weeks, he’s kicked me awake with his David Beckham impression between 4:00 and 4:30 a.m. As in pre-dawn!! As in EVERY MORNING!!!!

So, as I tried to rub some semblance of moisture back into my dry-contact-sealed eyes to solve the cell phone dilemma, I realized I hadn’t been awake from 4:00 on from the kicking. First thought? Wow, I must have been tired last night. Second thought? OH MY GOD, WHAT’S THE MATTER WITH STICK-IT?!?!?! Thinking back, I have noticed a change in his schedule of activity over the past week (meaning it’s becoming more normal; he’s not active all night and sleeping all day), but he’s started moving later (not as strong though). He seemed to be lower yesterday, and was fluttering and banging away, but it didn’t seem to be as strong as it had been. My rational mind kept telling me not to worry, but to counteract the rising I-can’t-breath-panic-attack-feeling, I called the OB nurse at my practice. After explaining the situation, I asked if I could come in to just get the heartbeat checked. Mind you, this is per Dr. Fav’s own instructions, he who had told me not to get a home fetal monitor, but to just come in whenever I needed to. Needless to say, hearing my mom’s voice, the voice of the woman who was my rock through finding out that Jimmy was gone, who was my L&D coach, who was there to hold and rock and kiss her grandson goodbye, and then having to put into words why I needed her to drive DS brought me to tears. She, of course, was ready to jump in the car to get to me. So, in reassuring her, I calmed myself down. Called DH and told me not to worry, but that for my sanity, I was going to have a listen. Announced to my boss that I needed to leave 15 minutes early for a doctor's appointment. She asked why. I told her that I just wanted to get checked, as he hadn't been as active today and that it was around the same time in the pregnancy as when we lost Jimmy (she was my boss then too). Her response? "Oh, you'll be fine. You don't know what I went through when you lost him. I couldn't even talk. I was so upset." I know in her own weird way she was trying to comfort me, but everything is always about her, and this was just another example of why, unless absolutely desperate, I have no intentions of coming back to this position after I have this child.

Off to the doc's I went, her words still ringing in my ears. After a short wait (I got to be one of the last patients of the day), I was in an exam room. Needless to say, Stick-It was fine. The nurse who did the check is a former coworker of Mom’s, and got the heartbeat right away. I could even hear the whooshing sound the valves make, since she was right over his heart. So, all is well, and I could sleep last night. Well, that is, until 3:27 a.m. this morning, when Stick-It decided to answer my prayers from the day before, and began his Muhammad Ali impression for the next 90 minutes!